Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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