I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
