Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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