Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
