I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
