Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
