we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
