wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
