Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
