Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
