I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
