Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
