the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
