bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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