i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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