That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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