Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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