I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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