Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
