god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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