At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
