I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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