using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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