I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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