if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just gift wrapped bread.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
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