i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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