Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
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