This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I wish there were birth control emojis
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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