I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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