they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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