You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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