You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i just had sex bonerless
now i know why i became what i already was.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
