Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
