quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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