My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
