That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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