i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
