I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Randomize
