YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
