i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
