so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize