normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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