Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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