i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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