I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
