I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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