Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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