I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
