it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
so much tequila, so little girl.
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