So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I want to walk on stilts...naked
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
