If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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